height="110">Close to you - Carpenters

Monday, January 12, 2009

2009 came. 2008 went past in a swoosh and a whoop.
Lessons learnt on first few days of 2009; things are not as they seemed. I have been troubled, yes and i hope that it has been partially resolved and fully settled when i come back from France.
Relationships between people can be so amazing. You can be acquaintances this week and buddies the next and remain as such for the rest of your lives. Or you can be buddies from when you were toddlers and stop contacting each other for the rest of the days. I always find good friends in unexpected places in unexpected people in a tweak of fate usually.
The closer secondary school friends are made after my secondary school days, when we are on our separate ways in our lives, studies and careers. And i enjoy the little times we have during gatherings.. when i can talk about myself, what i feel, what has been going on without fear of burdening them with it. My friend once commented on why i cant just confide in this particular friend of mine. I said "I dun think i can burden him with it, and i dun think he likes to be burdened with it". I can talk about myself non stop to people and listen to them talk about their lives, but these are things that can be said to anyone. Those deep secrets, secret feelings and wishes are reserved for the girls who looked on me with no expectations of me being more noble than anyone, being more pretentious than anyone. In short, there is no need to pretend in front of them. I am me.
And this gathering brings with it a tidings of problems in our lives and advices from them. It's comforting to be told that the emotions that i am feeling is as such and not wrong. I have been vexed over it for a while cause i am pretty stubborn when it comes to matters of the heart. I need to be totally clear and totally blameless, guiltless to anyone who's involved. And I am lucky i have them near at hand at this time.
And with that, on to a happier and equally worrying note.. I AM GOING TO PARIS IN 10 MORE DAYS! yes yes, i will be safe and safe.. i dunno wad else to say but i hope it is all worth it man! YES I CAN DO IT! MWAAHAHAH.
till then..

Posted by Jessica at Monday, January 12, 2009