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Monday, August 17, 2009

In official stress mode. Lab is squeezing me dry. very dry, that i am going back 7 days a week. going to put my foot down very soon.
Dance is supposed to be relaxing but recently, i think we are expecting too much from a one month plus partnership. It ended up that both of us are frustrated. He is frustrated, he shows it, i got affected.
School started last week. And knowing my sotongness, I have to deal with printing of notes and finding out the admin stuffs liek when are the cas and when are the lectures. I AM SUPER INAPT AT SUCH STUFFS.
In conclusion, i was almost driven to tears a few times this month. exasperation more like it. I just need some time to get used to and yes, i need to get used to it. Gatherings, outings and wad nots are taking second place to all the commitments i am having this year. People outside of lab and dance are hardly contacted and this isnt healthy. O wells, may my exasperation ends and may i just take things easier. My frens are pretty worried at the way i am doing my lab work.. going back at odd times and trying to finish things fast.. I need to pace myself and convince myself that this is a 2 sems project not a 2 months project.

I noticed that I am getting very exasperated and expecting too much when i dun get the results i want within a short period of time. I am trying to do too much in one plus month such that this short period of time after my sejour in Paris seemed like a year. SEP felt so long ago.. i forgot wad it is like to go on trips to nearby european countries.. all i remember from this one month is travellign to dance, lab, tuition, gatherings.. repeatedly. NON STOP questioning of my capability, be it in lab, school or dance.

Someone reassure me.. this is proving to be tougher than i imagine.

Till then..

Posted by Jessica at Monday, August 17, 2009